We make many decisions every day.
Most of them are relatively unimportant. Like, for example, whether we use lavender or rosemary shampoo.
But now and then we have to make difficult decisions that can have a significant impact on our lives:
- Should I quit my secure job to do something I enjoy more?
- Should I leave my partner or can we still save our relationship?
- Should I have a child or should I wait for it?
- Should I really get a tattoo?
- Should I invest my saved money in bitcoins?
What are decisions anyway?
Many people are very afraid of making decisions. Especially when they have to make tough decisions. This leads to them shirking decisions like a third-grader shirking homework.
But what’s the thought behind all this?
“As long as I don’t make up my mind, I can’t go wrong.”
Do you feel the same way?
Then make yourself aware of that
No decision is a decision either!
Yes, you read that right. You can’t make up your mind.
No matter how much you want to avoid a decision, you cannot hide from it. No, not even if you cover your ears, close your eyes, and sing out loud LALALALALA.
Grow up!
People who cannot make up their minds are often afraid of responsibility. Growing up implies making clear choices and accepting the consequences. You cannot look to the future. No matter how you go about it, you will always make mistakes and make wrong decisions.
But that’s always better than running away from life. For example, in 2013 I decided to quit my former job and study computer engineering. It was one of the most difficult and ultimately best decisions of my life.
At the time, of course, I didn’t know whether I had made the right decision. Nevertheless, at that time I made a clear decision instead of running away.
Make a decision!
Not making up your mind and being permanently undecided robs you of a lot of energy, focus, and clarity.
- Is your relationship not going well?
- Are you dissatisfied with your job?
- Are you considering moving into a new apartment?
Make a decision instead of fooling around forever. That means being an adult and taking responsibility.
Better a wrong decision than no decision at all! This brings me to the next point.
There is no wrong decision
Of course, there are stupid decisions like
- Drunk driving a car.
- To marry someone even though you do not love them.
- Wear sandals and socks at the same time.
- Having unprotected sex with a stranger.
- Smoking while knowing that it’s gonna kill you someday
But there are no wrong decisions at all. Let me explain to you why…
The moment we make up our minds, we believe we are making the right choice. After all, nobody would choose the wrong alternative if they knew beforehand that it was the wrong alternative.
So a decision can turn out to be wrong, but the moment we make it we believe it is the right one!
Which decision is the right one?
Simply, you don’t know!
A decision can turn out to be wrong in retrospect. But the moment we make up our minds, it appears to be the best option.
Therefore, if a decision turns out to be wrong in retrospect, you should be ready to accept its consequences. After all, you can’t look to the future!
The evaluation of decisions is often not possible at all
Another point is that it is difficult for us to judge whether our choice is really wrong.
Imagine that you have to choose between two employers:
- A big company with good career opportunities.
- A smaller company, with flat hierarchies and a lot of flexibility.
You choose the bigger company. But you don’t like the tasks and your colleagues are annoying. In short, you are dissatisfied with your decision and regret it.
You are probably now imagining that the smaller company would have been a better choice. But the thing is that you have no way of knowing whether the small company would really have been a better choice.
Originally posted on Medium
